Mind and Body

The mind impacts the body and vice versa. Have you ever said, “It’s a pain in the neck (or another body part)”?  We all tend to express feelings through our body.

Any illness that has physical symptoms but has the mind and emotions as its origin is called a psychosomatic illness. Although you may be told that it’s “all in your head”, these illnesses are not imaginary. The aches and pains are very real, but because your doctor is looking for an actual physical cause, they are very tricky to diagnose and treat. The key is to look for a source of stress in the person’s life that the person is not coping with. By treating the underlying stress and depression, it may be possible to heal the physical problems as well.

The word “stress” is defined by the Oxford Dictionary as “a state of affair involving demand on physical or mental energy“.  It is a condition or circumstance (not always adverse), which can disturb the normal physiological and psychological functioning of an individual. In medical phrasing “stress” is defined as a disturbance of the body’s homeostasis. This demand on mind-body occurs when it tries to cope with incessant changes in life. A “stress” condition seems “relative” in nature.  Stress will happen when we go through life changing experiences such as a break up or divorce, loss of employment, the death of a loved one, having a baby, etc. However, there are times when we don’t know why we are stressed. This is normal.  On the other hand, some of us live in a state of permanent stress. Anyone who is subjected to ongoing stress for an extended period will likely suffer emotional, physical and medical problems.

Stress lets us know that something is not right, that we are not at ease, that we are dis-eased.  As the negative emotions bottle up our stressed system becomes fragile and vulnerable to any threat and our immune system is in a weak position.

Many of us are very poorly equipped to deal with stress simply because we don’t know what stress is and how to manage it.  We perceive stress based upon what is happening around us, the kinds of events we are experiencing. If we are fighting with our partner or enduring financial problems, we feel stressed. We believe that if the problem goes away the stress will end.  When the situation changes we may feel some relief, but then something else pops up and we are right back to being stressed.

Stress is the end result of unexpressed emotions related to those events we are experiencing. When our emotional body is burdened with stress, or physical body responds chemically by producing the cortisol hormone, which engages the body in a protection mode. This hormone is so powerful that, as an example, a pregnant mother sends messages to the fetus through this hormone that change the character of the developing child’s psychology.  As our society becomes more complex, increasing levels of stress are becoming the norm. It is becoming an acceptable way of life to make a living of the expense of our health and well being. Although some aspects of life are becoming increasingly unhealthy, such as unacceptable levels of toxins in the water, daily radiation exposure and unhealthy air quality, we are expected to accept and adjust and pretend it doesn’t matter.  As stress becomes more of a hidden societal  disease, the changes in attitudes, behaviors and debilitating health consequences become simply a way of adjusting to it.

How often does a feeling come to the surface as a response to an experience and you hold it in, because another person might be injured or may not like you expressing the emotion? You may not want to offend the other person, but more likely you don’t want to run the risk of him not liking your current feeling and rejecting you.

The truth is that we always pay the price of allowing ourselves to be inhibited from out rightful emotional expression.  When we don’t take the emotional risk to express what is inside of us, we suffer.  Stress is the pressure of unexpressed emotions.  Many of us live in this state, accepting this as a way of life and feeling as if there is nothing we can do about it.  Ultimately prolonged stress leads to depression or nervous breakdown.

Life follows a certain logical pathway.  We are standing right in the middle of it as the creator of our own path.  Where we go from here no one knows.  However, while we are on this journey, we must be honest about our feelings and emotions, expressing them so that they do not take down the present with past experiences.  Inhibiting emotional expression causes us to experience the emotions over and over, eventually leading to feeling emotionally overwhelmed and stressed. To distress, we must express.

Once you know how to recognize when you are stressed, the next step is to learn coping mechanisms. One very important way to cope: DON’T HOLD IN YOUR FEELINGS! Controlled is safer and healthier for you. Controlled ways you can cope include: talking to someone you trust; a friend or a therapist; joining a support group; relaxation techniques; taking some leisure time for yourself; Intimacy; taking a break from the situation you’re in; herbs like Kava Kava or Valerian to help you relax; taking care of your health by eating right, exercising and not smoking; being honest with those around you (maintaining a lie is very energy consuming); letting go of old grudges; doing something nice for others (if you’re not accustomed to doing this) or taking some time just for you (if you are always sacrificing for everyone else). The list is endless. Just vent that steam!

The third and final component: willingness. We have to be willing to let go of our expectations about what we must do. We have to be willing to let go of old guilts and shoulds that are guiding our behavior. We have to allow ourselves to just be human. It’s okay for men and women to cry and be emotional. It’s okay to fall short of your goals if you’re doing the best that you can. Some of our biggest stressors actually come from within ourselves!